Obama's Gaff's & Gimmicks!

President Barack Obama has delivered on his promise of real change in at least one respect: The volume of gaffes and miscues sputtering forth from his Oval Office is unprecedented. For those who just can’t wait to hear what the president’s teleprompter will say next, here’s a recap of the Obama gaffe machine’s most remarkable – and disturbing – utterances:

Sacrifice good for others:  In his inaugural address, Obama calls on Americans to adopt a spirit of sacrifice, which apparently doesn’t include his own coronation. The $49 million cost of his swearing-in ceremony is triple the cost of Bush’s first inaugural.

Ooops! Obama stumbles badly over the oath of office, inadvertently led astray by Chief Justice John Roberts. A day later, the duo conduct a do-over, safely removed from TV cameras and press photographers. It’s hardly an auspicious start for the Obama administration.  

Keep the change? Obama promised a new era of openness and honesty in government, but his administration began under a cloud. New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson had withdrawn from consideration for commerce secretary because of a federal probe of campaign donations, and Treasury secretary nominee Tim Geithner was being skewered for failing to pay $34,000 in back taxes.  

Lobbyists, go home. Uh, wait, come back! Obama pledges lobbyists won’t work in his White House, then makes 17 exceptions during his first 10 days in office, including Attorney General Eric Holder and Deputy Defense Secretary William Lynn, a former lobbyist for Raytheon.    

Daschle, heal thyself! Just two days after Obama professes he “absolutely” supports former Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle for Health secretary, Obama accepts his resignation. Daschle couldn’t heal the political wounds caused by his failure to pay $146,000 in taxes.

Obama’s revolving door. Good-government advocate Obama loses another nominee. Nancy Killefer steps down from consideration to become the government’s first chief performance officer, when it is learned her past performance includes failure to pay taxes for her household help.   

Accuracy is not job one. Obama promises workers at Caterpillar Inc. that his stimulus bill will save their jobs. Uh, not exactly, Caterpillar CEO Jim Owens later clarifies. "The truth is we're going to have more layoffs before we start hiring again," he says, to Obama’s chagrin.

Partisanship you can believe in. The White House manages to politicize the 2010 U.S. Census by announcing it will be directed by the White House under the auspices of Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel. Republicans warn it will politicize apportionment of House seats, redistricting, and distribution of federal aid.

Review gets jettisoned. Obama’s promise of a 48-hour review period for all legislation is tossed by the wayside. During debate over the revised stimulus bill, House Minority Leader John Boehner dramatically throws the 1,100-page document to the ground, charging that not a single member of Congress has had time to read the $787 billion spending measure.

Bipartisan — not! Obama’s stimulus package squeaks through the Senate because of GOP defections from Senators Olympia Snowe, Susan Collins, and Arlen Specter. Specter, a two-time cancer survivor, wins a $6.5 billion federal subsidy for cancer research.

Obama’s urgent weekend. Obama says approving his $787 billion stimulus package is urgent. Congress gets its work done on Friday, but Obama and wife Michelle fly off on Air Force One to Chicago. There, they relax over Valentine’s Day weekend and dine at a romantic restaurant, before flying back to the nation’s capital on Monday to sign the bill finally.

Bipartisan nightmare. Sen. Lindsey Graham, R-S.C., tells ABC’s “This Week”: “If this is going to be bipartisanship, the country's screwed. I know bipartisanship when I see it.”

Selling low. Obama likens the stock markets to political “tracking polls,” suggesting they’re unimportant. When Obama speaks, Wall Street listens — and sells. The market hits a seven-year low as the Dow dips below 7,000.

The check’s in the mail. The Chicago Sun-Times reports Obama still hasn’t paid the $1.74 million bill his campaign owes his hometown for his victory celebration in Grant’s Park.

Tooting the wrong horn. Inexplicably, during his first address to a joint session of Congress Obama states: “And I believe the nation that invented the automobile cannot walk away from it.” Gaffe alert: A German invented the automobile.

Spurned billet-doux. In a letter to Dmitri Medvedev, Obama offers to drop plans for a missile shield in Europe, if Russia can help in resolving the nuclear weapons issue in Iran. Medvedev says he will not "haggle" over Iran and the missile shield.

Taxing times at Treasury. Another Obama appointee bites the dust. This time, it’s Annette Nazareth, who was nominated for Deputy Treasury Secretary to give Timothy Geithner help he desperately needs. Nazareth withdraws for undisclosed "personal reasons," following a month-long probe into her taxes and other matters.

Not-so-special relationship? In their first meeting, British Prime Minister Gordon Brown gave Obama a carved ornamental penholder from the timbers of the anti-slavery ship HMS Gannet. Obama’s gift in return: 25 DVDs that don't work in Europe. His gift a month later to Queen Elizabeth doesn’t quite make up for the snub, either: It’s an iPod full of his own speeches.

High-profile political surgery. The administration flirts with naming CNN’s chief medical correspondent, Sanjay Gupta, as Surgeon General. The TV personality pulls his name back out of the hat, withdrawing for reasons unknown.

Overly vetted. Caroline Atkinson withdraws as Obama’s nominee for Undersecretary of International Affairs in the Treasury Department. She blames the long vetting process.

Don’t alert the media! When The National Newspaper Publishers Association named Obama its 'Newsmaker of the Year,' the Obama White House closed the press-award ceremony to — who else? — the press. Didn’t want the news to leak out, perhaps?

Bobbing and weaving on 60 Minutes. There’s nothing like a near brush with economic depression to bring a case of the giggles, so 60 Minutes correspondent Steve Kroft dares to ask the president: “Are you punch drunk?” Obama explains he’s just maintaining a sense of “gallows humor” over the meltdown.

\Prompting a president. Obama carries an oversized teleprompter into the White House East Room for a news conference. He opens the session reading prepared remarks, and the device is visible in some camera shots. Later, jokes abound on the Internet regarding Obama’s teleprompter dependence.

Friendly questions only, please. The media lavishes Obama with praise for holding an innovative town meeting that includes online questions. A few days later, news leaks that only devout Obama supporters were chosen to ask questions from the live audience, however.

Pressing the royal flesh. Although British authorities insist it’s technically not a breach of protocol, Michelle Obama causes quite a stir during the G-20 conference by giving the queen a hug. Queen Elizabeth handles the matter with her usual aplomb.

Bowing to Big Oil. Obama genuflects so low to Saudi King Abdullah that he just about scrapes his chin. Later, an Obama aide insists: "It wasn't a bow. He grasped his hand with two hands, and he's taller than King Abdullah." Footnote: Abdullah presides over a dictatorship that outlaws Christianity, forbids women the right to vote or drive a car, and flogs gay people.

Spurning shelter dogs. Obama irritates animal rights activist by adding a new family member to his household: Bo, a Portuguese Water Dog who does not come from a shelter.

Too slick for Castro. Obama eases travel and remittance restrictions on Cuba, and considers dropping the embargo on Cuba. Fidel Castro later expresses his exasperation with Obama’s way with words, saying Obama "misinterpreted" what his brother Raul had said. Cuba would not be willing to negotiate about human rights, Castro insists.

Covering up Jesus. For an April 14 speech at Georgetown, the administration asked the university to cover up all signs and symbols, including the gold letters "IHS," a symbol for Jesus. The administration later explains it simply asked that all distracting symbols and images be covered, and wasn’t trying to conceal Jesus specifically.

Tea parties? What tea parties? When untold thousands rally nationwide to protest excessive taxation, the White House tries to ignore the whole issue, hoping it will go away. ABC News reports the president “is unaware of the tea parties."

To prosecute, or not to prosecute.
Obama and his staff vacillate on whether to prosecute those who carried out “enhanced interrogations,” first saying that CIA operatives carrying out orders are in the clear, then later saying it’s up to Attorney General Eric Holder to decide whether some officials should be prosecuted for trying to keep America safe.

Cornered by Chavez. At the Summit of the Americas, Venezuelan strongman Hugo Chavez grabs Obama’s hand and presents him with the anti-American screed “The Open Veins of Latin America.” Despite Obama’s winsome ways, Chavez says later: “Nobody should be mistaken. The empire is there, alive and kicking."

Sowing dissention. In the Senate and on the campaign trail, Barack Obama promised to redress the grievances of black farmers who suffered from racial discrimination to the tune of $4 billion. Once in office, Obama’s Justice Department moves to cap the payments at $100 million in addition to prior settlements. This draws the ire of the Congressional Black Caucus.

Warming the globe on Earth Day. In celebration of Earth Day, Obama takes two flights on Air Force One and four on Marine One to reach his ultimate destination, Iowa. He burns up more than 9,000 gallons of fuel in the process.

Teleprompter dependence. In an address to the National Academy of Sciences, Obama introduced members of the President’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology. Then he introduced them again, thanks to a teleprompter malfunction. Obama looked at the machine, which he relies on for most public appearances, and asked for help.